Dear Susi Q addresses ageism: Don’t call me “kiddo” – but don’t call me “senior” either
By Lynette Brasfield
A while back, during Covid quarantine days, I returned home after hiking up Park Avenue from the high school all the way to Top of the World and back. That’s about four miles and quite an elevation gain – and I’ve hiked a lot further and up steeper terrain many times.
As I arrived back, my twenty-something neighbor smiled at me. “Did you have a nice walk?” he asked.
I bristled inwardly at his assumption that given my advanced age (66 at the time), I was capable only of a “nice walk.” Now, I know he was just being polite, but it’s that sort of remark that tends to irk us older adults.
Some people hate being called “dear” (me) and some don’t like to be called “sweetie.”
Chris Quilter (80) resents being called “young man.”
We all have our peeves.
Of course, we don’t like to be called seniors, either.
So what’s a sensitive non-senior to do? We are incorrigible.
Most of the time, those kinds of remarks are easy to laugh off. Usually they’re well-intended.
Still, ageism is real. It even has its own day: Wednesday October 9 this year.
Here at the Susi Q, we encourage people of all ages to attend our many offerings, from author evenings to opera performances to art classes. That’s because we believe that intermingling the generations is a heck of a lot more fun for everyone. Who wants to exist in a silo limited by age alone?
Every day here I’m reminded of the brainpower of the over-50 crowd and their desire for intellectual stimulation. Recently, I chatted with Alison King and Joel Goldstein, both long-time members of the Science Club, which is celebrating its 15th anniversary this year.
These are some of the topics these smart people have covered: artificial Intelligence, elephant behavior, cicadas, asteroids, benefits of metformin, gun control, brain-computer linkages, quantum phenomena, stress in LGBTQ people, consciousness, the evolution of intelligence, CRISPR, solar flares, and robotics.
How great is that, to have the time to discuss such fascinating topics?
Then, of course, our yoga and exercise classes are replete with people full of vigor regardless of age. Volunteers for one of our partner nonprofits, Laguna Canyon Foundation, are usually retired and exceedingly active.
Oh, and my sixty-something friend Kathy just hiked 230 miles coast-to-coast across England, from the Irish Sea to the North Sea, in less than two weeks.
That brings to mind a term that was coined recently by a contributor to The New York Times: Full-time recreationist. I like it. Beats senior any day!
I’ll finish with a quote I read recently, offered by an 84-year-old. She says that when she’s asked a dumb question like “What’s your secret to reaching that age?” she just replies, “I haven’t died yet.”
Which is the important thing really, isn’t it, no matter the number of years you’ve lived? Carpe diem, one and all.
If you’d like to share your experience with ageism – or suggest another topic for Dear Susi Q to explore – email Lynette at LynetteB@thesusiq.org. Also, there’s always something new at the Susi Q, so please visit thesusiq.org to learn about our wide range of programs and classes or to sign up for our newsletter.
